Tuesday, November 12, 2013
For my first blog post, I'm going to tackle the hardest of all. This scene is a recreation of what is most likely the darkest moment in my life. I had been incredibly depressed, and the pressures of an awkward social life and failing academics had become too much. I decided it was time.
I attempted to overdose on some pills I had found around the house. I remember the words I thought as I got ready to close my eyes for what I thought would be the last time-I'm free. Whatever it was that was consuming me had won. I gave up and gave in.
Thankfully, I woke up the next morning, but had to put on a happy face and pretend it never happened. It took me well over a decade to let anyone know this ever happened. I still have a hard time talking about it, and likely will for the rest of my life. This was only the first of many attempts to come-all, thankfully, quite unsuccessful.
The words "I'm free" have stuck with me ever since this particular attempt. Recently, however, they have taken on a new meaning through therapy and treatment, and mean that something great is sure to be on the horizon.