Sunday, August 10, 2014
During high phases, I have had some issues with my mind racing. I don't mean in the same way as the "A million thoughts" post. I mean in ways I've never experienced. It races so hard that I have zero control over what it os I say. It's like my mind is on so many channels that it feels like static. Basically, it's too much information to pick out any one thought or idea. Or anything, really. In fact, it causes me to literally think myself into a migraine. During these points, I can't form a clear train of thought, similar to a child's first few paragraphs in school. I start talking about a photograph I want to talk about, and in two sentences, I've landed on NASA-not a part of the intended conversation.
The worst part of this is that I've even said some things that have hurt people, not intentionally, that I regret. While I admit they are not my fault, I recognize that I did say them and that I need to take responsibility for my actions and words. It's not fun to have no control over what you do, but the worst part is by far seeing how those unintentional actions effect others.